Photos can be misleading

Our appearance is always of paramount importance as we never get a second chance to make a first impression. We are not always available in person for people to sum us up, so these days we rely a lot on photos. They abound on internet sites and we make our decisions whether or not to make contact with people based on their photos.

In my own profession as a romance expert, I personally find that photos can be very misleading. A specific incident comes to mind: One of the men on my books was about to meet one of my ladies, but he insisted on seeing a photo of her first. He asked her to email it to him, which she did. He then phoned me and was very worried about meeting her as he did not like her face and was most put off. I know this lady in question very well. She is very attractive and in my opinion it was a very nice photo of her. I almost had to beg him to meet her. I knew it was a good match in all ways, including the kind of looks he had requested. He most reluctantly met her. That evening he phoned me and said that her photo did not do her justice, that she was absolutely stunning and that they suited each other very well. She also gave me feedback that she was very impressed and that she liked him very much.

As we get to know people, they reveal more and more about themselves, and it is like peeling the skin off an onion, layer by layer. It is only when we start reaching the layers close to the core that we can really know whether this person is suited to us or not. Yes, personal appearance is important, but it reveals even less than the tip of the iceberg, so to speak. When we see a photo, we cannot hear that person, we have no idea of the kind of vibes they are sending out, and we make a judgement based on an extremely flimsy piece of evidence.

Photos give us a first impression, but we should always bear in mind that there is much more to a person than just their photo.

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