How to make a success of every relationship

Sometimes singles have very black or white ideas about relationships, particularly if a marriage or short or long term relationship has not worked out. They tend to think in absolutes, that because it didn’t last forever, the relationship was a failure, or worse still, that they themselves are failures.

It would help if people would just look at the whole scenario differently. Firstly, you are carrying a very heavy weight by believing that you or your relationship was a failure. Secondly, this is not even true! Every relationship is a success if you grow from it and learn how to make better and more conscious decisions the next time round. You will have learned lessons from this relationship, which will stand you in good stead for all future relationships, and you are a better person because of what you have learned.

Often I hear people say:

“I’ve been divorced more than once. I’m a complete failure when it comes to relationships.”

Or “None of the relationships I have been in have worked out.”

One must learn to think differently about these relationships. Rather train yourself to think:

“What have I learned from my marriage(s) and divorce(s) that I can use to make healthy, conscious choices as I move forward?”

Or “What have I learned from this/these relationship(s) and how am I a better person because of them?”

So stop beating yourself up about your past failed relationships, change your attitude about them and see them as learning processes. See yourself as a WINNER for having gone through the experience and coming out wiser at the other side. See yourself as brave for having made the attempt and know that you have definitely not lost anything.

I wish you luck for your future relationships!

© 2008 Marilyn Welch

Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details on the Contact Us / Register page.

Visit my website to meet a variety of quality partners amongst whom you may find your soulmate!

Visit the Coaching section of my website for practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.

You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.