Love Languages in a Relationship

Do you know that each of us has a special love language(s) through which we communicate with our partner? According to Gary Chapman, author of “The Five Languages of Love”, they are: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service and Physical Touch We usually communicate our love to our partner through one or maybe two of these languages. The problems set in when our partner speaks a different love language to what we do! We might think our partner does not love us, meanwhile they really do, but are speaking a different love language which we maybe do not understand so well, so we miscommunicate. If your partner often speaks encouraging words to you, it is likely that Words of Affirmation is his/her primary love language. And if this is the case, they will definitely appreciate it if you do the same for them. Watch your partner to see if you can identify their love language. This also corresponds to their values, and if you can link your values to theirs, you will have something marvellous in common. Speak their love language back to them, and a deeper understanding and love will grow between the two of you. Some people like receiving gifts. Your gift need not be big or expensive. It is the thought that counts. If you notice that your partner likes giving you gifts, they will more than likely appreciate receiving them too. Regard your gift giving as an investment in your relationship. In some cases this can be priceless. When Dr Chapman talks about physical touch, he is not only referring to the sex act, but to loving caresses you may bestow on your partner at odd times of the day, like rubbing his/her arm when you are talking to him/her. Some people like showing their affection via a loving touch. Be on the lookout for signs like this so that you can know your partner’s love language. If you do not speak the same love language as your partner, you may think they do not love you, which may not at all be true. You may simply be misunderstanding each other. Do yourself a favour and read “The Five Languages of Love” by Gary Chapman. People like being addressed in their own language, and so it is also with our own unique love language. Reading this book may just shine a light on a failing relationship. © 2009, 2013 Marilyn Welch. Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Introduction Society for Professionals and in the last year, over 40% of the clients who joined Perfect Strangers met someone special, many within a very few short months! Visit our website to meet a variety of quality partners amongst whom you may find your soulmate.