Never take people at face value

We all know the saying “You never get a second chance to make a first impression”, but first impressions can be very deceiving. People are generally on their best behaviour when one meets them, and the true person usually only emerges with time. One can liken getting to know a person with peeling an onion: there are many layers covering the core.

I nearly fell into this trap when I met my current partner, with whom I am very happy. When I first met him I thought (erroneously) that he was not my type, and more or less discouraged him from contacting me. It was a year later that we met again, and then I was more willing to give him the time of day, only to realise he was almost exactly what I had always been looking for in very many ways! The first time I met him he did not show all his cards, and I took him at face value, never realising what a diamond had crossed my path.

Men and women often make snap decisions about whether they are attracted to a person or not. Perhaps we would all find many more people to our liking if we would just give them a chance beyond the first meeting. Food for thought …

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Never Be Hasty

So often it happens that someone comes onto my books and is really in a hurry to meet someone special. That is when red flags start waving in my head and I realise that this person is on the wrong track. While it is true that my clients often do pair up quickly, it is not a good thing when someone is hasty.

When you want to meet someone quickly, you are likely to make snap decisions which are not based on a good foundation. You do not get to know your partner well before committing to a relationship and this can lead to big regrets later. It is also likely that there are things you have not sorted out in your own life, which is essential before committing to a relationship.

When my clients relax and take time with their dating, it’s almost as if they get into a kind of “flow”, and things they want seem to come naturally to them. If they are anxious and in a hurry, their partners seem to flee from them.

So sort out in your mind what is bothering you, and approach dating without being too hung up on results or outcomes. Have fun and enjoy each moment for what it is, and your dating will take care of itself.

Visit my website to find out more about this sensible way of going about dating.