Running my professional dating service, Perfect Strangers, certainly shows me that people have a wide variety of different motives for wanting a special romantic relationship. In general, women seem to think more of a committed long term relationship, whilst men seem to think more of having fun with their partners and enjoying what each moment brings. Neither approach is wrong. Men and women are just different, and maybe these differences are teaching us to love and appreciate the opposite sex!
I cannot stress enough the importance of living in the present moment and enjoying what each moment brings. If we are results oriented in our dating and relationships, we can very easily set ourselves up for disappointment. If our partner senses that we want something from them other than simply the pleasure of their company, we bring issues and complications into the relationship and this can really spoil a friendship that has the potential to be something special.
In relationships, women like security whilst men like a challenge. We as women all need to realise that our only true security lies within ourselves. Another human simply cannot cater for all our needs. We need to develop the independence to understand and apply this knowledge. I have seen in my practice that a woman who has this kind of mindset is automatically a challenge for her partner. By having this kind of outlook, a woman is more likely to have success in a long term relationship and thus meets her need of a long term commitment from her partner. This is most certainly an excellent way of setting up a spiral of a potentially good relationship which satisfies the needs of both parties.
Visit my professional dating service website to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate.
Visit the coaching section of my website to find more practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
We all like a challenge
When it comes to dating, we always seem to want the one we can’t quite get, the one who we are not sure of. The dates that run after us like puppy dogs all bore us to tears. It is just human nature to pursue something that is elusive. We must be careful and ensure that the person we are pursuing is really worth it, that we won’t end up like a dog that has caught a car and doesn’t know what to do with it!
In order to be a challenge, we must ensure that we are not desperate. If we come across as too eager, it can easily kill the attraction our partner feels for us. Women especially need to be on their guard against this as it is still true that a man likes to be the hunter, despite what modern life may lead us to believe. A man who is desperate simply comes across as a wimp, as most women want a strong man that they can look up to.
If we have a healthy self-liking and self-respect, we are at least half way there to being a challenge. We should all have a strong support network and lots of good hobbies and interests. These are the things that will help keep us emotionally independent and not desperate. We need to have our own independent and rewarding personal life outside of our work and careers, and outside of any romantic relationships. If we lead this kind of a life we are likely to be seen as desirable and someone worth pursuing.
Join my professional dating service to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
Visit the coaching section of my website for some practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
In order to be a challenge, we must ensure that we are not desperate. If we come across as too eager, it can easily kill the attraction our partner feels for us. Women especially need to be on their guard against this as it is still true that a man likes to be the hunter, despite what modern life may lead us to believe. A man who is desperate simply comes across as a wimp, as most women want a strong man that they can look up to.
If we have a healthy self-liking and self-respect, we are at least half way there to being a challenge. We should all have a strong support network and lots of good hobbies and interests. These are the things that will help keep us emotionally independent and not desperate. We need to have our own independent and rewarding personal life outside of our work and careers, and outside of any romantic relationships. If we lead this kind of a life we are likely to be seen as desirable and someone worth pursuing.
Join my professional dating service to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
Visit the coaching section of my website for some practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Love covers a multitude of sins
Love is what makes the world go round, and it is what we all crave, in one form or another. When we are young we get love from our parents and siblings. As we grow older we start making friends and we learn to love them. When we become teenagers we start having love relationships with the opposite sex, and these relationships are normally a challenge for the rest of our lives!
In any relationship, the more good we do our partner and the more love we shower on them, the more “cash” we are likely to have in their “emotional bank account”. (Steven Covey goes into detail about one’s emotional bank account in his book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”). If we have a lot of cash in someone’s emotional bank account and we only make occasional withdrawals (like sometimes treating them a bit unfairly), the bank account will remain relatively healthy. If we do something really dreadful to our partner, or treat them really badly, it amounts to a huge withdrawal, and the bank account may end up in the red! In a relationship, the trick is to maintain a healthy bank balance in both partners’ emotional bank accounts. In the Bible it states that love covers a multitude of sins. That is certainly true. If you know that your partner loves you and treats you well, you are likely to ignore minor things that he/she does wrong. This all adds up to a happy and healthy relationship.
Let my professional dating service put you in the running for having that wonderful romantic relationship!
Visit the coaching section of my website for some no-nonsense, practical dating and relationship advice.
In any relationship, the more good we do our partner and the more love we shower on them, the more “cash” we are likely to have in their “emotional bank account”. (Steven Covey goes into detail about one’s emotional bank account in his book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”). If we have a lot of cash in someone’s emotional bank account and we only make occasional withdrawals (like sometimes treating them a bit unfairly), the bank account will remain relatively healthy. If we do something really dreadful to our partner, or treat them really badly, it amounts to a huge withdrawal, and the bank account may end up in the red! In a relationship, the trick is to maintain a healthy bank balance in both partners’ emotional bank accounts. In the Bible it states that love covers a multitude of sins. That is certainly true. If you know that your partner loves you and treats you well, you are likely to ignore minor things that he/she does wrong. This all adds up to a happy and healthy relationship.
Let my professional dating service put you in the running for having that wonderful romantic relationship!
Visit the coaching section of my website for some no-nonsense, practical dating and relationship advice.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Focus on your partner's good points
When a relationship is new, it is all too easy to see only the good in one’s partner. One sees him/her through rose-tinted spectacles and we are very excited about having this person in our life.
As time goes by, however, the spectacles come off and we see this person in a more realistic perspective, warts and all. If you really care for him/her, it is very important to focus on your partner’s good points and not the bad ones. If your relationship is generally a happy one, what you focus on, you’ll get more of and if you turn a blind eye to the bad points, they will tend to fade away. If there is something you cannot tolerate, deal with it and move on, but if you dwell on it, it will only get worse.
We make ourselves unhappy by thinking about negative things, so not only is it good for our relationship to be positive, it is also good for us personally. Treat a person as if they are wonderful, and they will tend to live up to your expectations.
Visit my website to find out more about my professional dating service and to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
Visit the coaching section of my website for some no-nonsense, practical dating and relationship advice.
As time goes by, however, the spectacles come off and we see this person in a more realistic perspective, warts and all. If you really care for him/her, it is very important to focus on your partner’s good points and not the bad ones. If your relationship is generally a happy one, what you focus on, you’ll get more of and if you turn a blind eye to the bad points, they will tend to fade away. If there is something you cannot tolerate, deal with it and move on, but if you dwell on it, it will only get worse.
We make ourselves unhappy by thinking about negative things, so not only is it good for our relationship to be positive, it is also good for us personally. Treat a person as if they are wonderful, and they will tend to live up to your expectations.
Visit my website to find out more about my professional dating service and to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
Visit the coaching section of my website for some no-nonsense, practical dating and relationship advice.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
We all appreciate a consistent partner
Running my professional dating service, Perfect Strangers, has taught me a lot about what people want in a romantic partner.
One of the qualities my clients seem to appreciate most in a partner is someone who is reliable, consistent and congruent. We like to know that this person will usually answer our call, and if they can’t, they will come back to us if we leave a message. We like to know that if we make an arrangement with them, they will honour it, or let us know in time if there is a problem. We like to know that if we have a problem, we can phone this person and they will always be friendly and kind, unless there is really something terrible bothering them, and then they will explain why they are not their usual self. We also like to know that, consistent with their normal behaviour, they will try to help us with this problem, if at all possible. It is important to not only want and expect this kind of behaviour from our date or partner, but to also behave this way ourselves.
Ah, you say, but I like someone who surprises me, who is not predictable. Yes, this is nice too, but within limits. There is a fine balance between being interesting in this way and being downright unreliable and making people feel uneasy around you. Keep all this in mind when entering a new relationship. By following this dating and relationship advice you will show that you can be a good friend, which is a sound basis for any romance.
Visit my website to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
Visit the coaching section of my website to find some practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
One of the qualities my clients seem to appreciate most in a partner is someone who is reliable, consistent and congruent. We like to know that this person will usually answer our call, and if they can’t, they will come back to us if we leave a message. We like to know that if we make an arrangement with them, they will honour it, or let us know in time if there is a problem. We like to know that if we have a problem, we can phone this person and they will always be friendly and kind, unless there is really something terrible bothering them, and then they will explain why they are not their usual self. We also like to know that, consistent with their normal behaviour, they will try to help us with this problem, if at all possible. It is important to not only want and expect this kind of behaviour from our date or partner, but to also behave this way ourselves.
Ah, you say, but I like someone who surprises me, who is not predictable. Yes, this is nice too, but within limits. There is a fine balance between being interesting in this way and being downright unreliable and making people feel uneasy around you. Keep all this in mind when entering a new relationship. By following this dating and relationship advice you will show that you can be a good friend, which is a sound basis for any romance.
Visit my website to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
Visit the coaching section of my website to find some practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Don't have unrealistic expectations
With my professional dating service, Perfect Strangers, I sometimes find that my clients have unrealistic expectations. They come to me having had problematic relationships in the past, expecting that everything will be just plain sailing once they join my service.
Life is just not like that, and the people who join my service are real and not the type of people you may read about in romanitc fantasies. My joining criteria are strict to ensure that only the best people are admitted, but we are all in the same boat, doing our best and trying to make sense of this crazy but wonderful life. We all have our own unique problems and set of circumstances to deal with, and sometimes this can cause friction between us and our romantic partners.
Whilst it is true that we should always expect the best, we need to be flexible and allow for our partner's idiosyncrasies. We should remember that we ourselves are also not perfect. We should all know what we are looking for in our ideal partner whilst at the same time keeping our feet planted firmly on the ground.
Having said that, I would urge you to visit my website to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
You can also visit the coaching section of my website for some practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
Life is just not like that, and the people who join my service are real and not the type of people you may read about in romanitc fantasies. My joining criteria are strict to ensure that only the best people are admitted, but we are all in the same boat, doing our best and trying to make sense of this crazy but wonderful life. We all have our own unique problems and set of circumstances to deal with, and sometimes this can cause friction between us and our romantic partners.
Whilst it is true that we should always expect the best, we need to be flexible and allow for our partner's idiosyncrasies. We should remember that we ourselves are also not perfect. We should all know what we are looking for in our ideal partner whilst at the same time keeping our feet planted firmly on the ground.
Having said that, I would urge you to visit my website to meet a variety of quality partners from whom you can choose a soulmate!
You can also visit the coaching section of my website for some practical, no-nonsense dating and relationship advice.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Be happy with your present circumstances
We seem to spend our entire lives searching and striving for what we perceive we do not have. These days we are bombarded with stimuli urging us to buy this, do that, etc. We are seldom encouraged to take stock of what we already have and learn to be content with it.
The same goes for our relationships. We always feel there is something missing or that maybe someone else will do it better for us. No. No. No. If we step back, count our blessings and take time to be sincerely grateful for what we have, the universe is more likely to give us more of those good things.
Perhaps now is the time to jump off that hamster wheel, break out and LIVE HAPPILY IN THE NOW. Quit thinking of yesterday or tomorrow, just be happy for what is happening now. Learn to appreciate your partner and enjoy his/her company NOW. Now is all we have. Live your relationship to the full so that you will never have regrets. Your partner will love you for it!
If you are single at the moment, structure your life in such a way that you thoroughly enjoy it. Learn to be happy with what you already have. This contentment is more likely to attract a good partner than an attitude of dissatisfaction. Remember that your mindset is constantly giving off signals to the universe and according to the Law of Attraction, you will attract what you think about most. Food for thought ...
Visit my website to make use of my professional dating service. Visit the coaching section of my website to find sound dating and relationship advice.
The same goes for our relationships. We always feel there is something missing or that maybe someone else will do it better for us. No. No. No. If we step back, count our blessings and take time to be sincerely grateful for what we have, the universe is more likely to give us more of those good things.
Perhaps now is the time to jump off that hamster wheel, break out and LIVE HAPPILY IN THE NOW. Quit thinking of yesterday or tomorrow, just be happy for what is happening now. Learn to appreciate your partner and enjoy his/her company NOW. Now is all we have. Live your relationship to the full so that you will never have regrets. Your partner will love you for it!
If you are single at the moment, structure your life in such a way that you thoroughly enjoy it. Learn to be happy with what you already have. This contentment is more likely to attract a good partner than an attitude of dissatisfaction. Remember that your mindset is constantly giving off signals to the universe and according to the Law of Attraction, you will attract what you think about most. Food for thought ...
Visit my website to make use of my professional dating service. Visit the coaching section of my website to find sound dating and relationship advice.
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