What is the glue that keeps relationships fun and exciting? Two major factors come to mind: chemistry and romance. Chemistry is either there or not there, and there is not much you can do to change it. But romance is equally as important, and it is something that can be worked on by both parties.
We experience many different kinds of relationships in life, but the ones that we remember as the most poignant are those where romance has played a big role. Romance is what makes your partner special: it sets your partner apart from the crowd. We often think of romance as gigantic gestures which are obvious and “in your face”. But it is the small things that count (as my clients tell me again and again). You can make a habit of keeping romance alive by doing little, inexpensive things that will make your partner love you to bits!
Gestures of caring and consideration are very important when it comes to romance. Do you make it a habit to always be kind to your partner? Romance does not start in the bedroom, but is the way you treat your partner on a 24/7 basis! It is easy to be romantic when a relationship is new, but it is very important to keep up those wonderful habits you got into when your relationship started and make them a way of life. When you see couples that have been happily married for years, they have inevitably kept the fires of romance consistently burning.
Romance need not be an expensive thing to maintain. It can be kept alive by being aware of the love language(s) that your partner speaks. (For more information on this read “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman.) To summarise, the languages are:
1. Words of Affirmation (These are positive and often involve sincere praise and encouragement)
2. Physical Touch (This covers a much broader base than sex on its own)
3. Quality Time
4. Deeds of Service
5. Gift Giving (Gifts can be small and inexpensive – it’s the thought that counts!)
Think about these five aspects of a relationship, and work out which one(s) appeals most to your partner. The way your partner treats you is a clue: they will relate to you according to their own love language(s), which is usually easy to spot. The very fact that you are making an effort indicates that you are already working on the romance in your relationship.
Don’t: Let your relationship run on autopilot.
Do: Make romance a habit, and watch love blossom!
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
Practise gratitude in your relationship
There is something that almost all of us overlook when it comes to relationships, and that is sincere appreciation for our partner. We all need to practise gratitude in life, especially when it comes to our partners. Never take a good relationship for granted, because you never know how long that person may still be with you. If your partner is showing you sincere appreciation for all you do for him/her, you just want to do more and more for them, and so the relationship goes in an upward spiral of just getting better and better.
Sometimes in a relationship it can become hard to find things to be grateful for. Perhaps you and your partner are going through a difficult patch and things are not going so well. Isn’t it a good idea to rather focus on whatever you can find that is positive than to dwell on the negative and make yourself unhappy? You will find that if you focus on something positive, you will get more of that thing, and the negatives will tend to fade away. It all boils down to the Law of Attraction: You will attract into your life what you think about most.
Gratitude is a habit and a way of life. It is a universal principle that applies in all spheres of life. Why would the universe give you more of something you like if you are not grateful for what you already have? It applies to our finances as well. If you teach yourself how to work with money, appreciate every cent you earn and work hard for it, you are more likely to prosper financially than if you have a “don’t care” attitude towards money. Similarly, if we study the art of good relationships, cultivate good habits in our relationship and appreciate our partner for being in our life, our relationship is likely to be healthy and very rewarding.
If one has not yet consciously practised the habit of gratitude, how does one start? At the end of each day, before you go to sleep, think over the day and find at least five good things to thank your Creator for. Even better, write them down. Make this a daily habit, and before long you will find that your whole attitude to life has changed, and you are much happier. Moreover, as the years pass, this habit becomes ingrained, and you are a better person for it. At the same time, seize every opportunity to appreciate your partner, and let them know that you appreciate them. They will love you for it.
Don’t: Take life and your partner for granted.
Do: Seize every opportunity to sincerely appreciate life and the wonderful partner that you have.
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought-after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
Sometimes in a relationship it can become hard to find things to be grateful for. Perhaps you and your partner are going through a difficult patch and things are not going so well. Isn’t it a good idea to rather focus on whatever you can find that is positive than to dwell on the negative and make yourself unhappy? You will find that if you focus on something positive, you will get more of that thing, and the negatives will tend to fade away. It all boils down to the Law of Attraction: You will attract into your life what you think about most.
Gratitude is a habit and a way of life. It is a universal principle that applies in all spheres of life. Why would the universe give you more of something you like if you are not grateful for what you already have? It applies to our finances as well. If you teach yourself how to work with money, appreciate every cent you earn and work hard for it, you are more likely to prosper financially than if you have a “don’t care” attitude towards money. Similarly, if we study the art of good relationships, cultivate good habits in our relationship and appreciate our partner for being in our life, our relationship is likely to be healthy and very rewarding.
If one has not yet consciously practised the habit of gratitude, how does one start? At the end of each day, before you go to sleep, think over the day and find at least five good things to thank your Creator for. Even better, write them down. Make this a daily habit, and before long you will find that your whole attitude to life has changed, and you are much happier. Moreover, as the years pass, this habit becomes ingrained, and you are a better person for it. At the same time, seize every opportunity to appreciate your partner, and let them know that you appreciate them. They will love you for it.
Don’t: Take life and your partner for granted.
Do: Seize every opportunity to sincerely appreciate life and the wonderful partner that you have.
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought-after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
There is a blessing in every relationship
Sometimes we wonder why we ever landed up in certain relationships. Everything just seems to go wrong and sometimes things get so twisted we just don’t know what to do. And often there doesn’t seem to be any end in sight. What are we supposed to do in these circumstances?
Firstly it is good to remember that there is a divine balance in our universe. To the degree that something is bad, we can also find good things about it! You might ask what good there could possibly be in your situation, but if you think very deeply and for some time, you are bound to come up with some benefits, believe it or not. Often it is only in hindsight that we can see these blessings, but they are always there, if we just scratch beneath the surface.
Perhaps we “pushed” a relationship that was not yet “ripe”. Perhaps we took our partner for granted. Perhaps we neglected our partner. Maybe we were selfish … This list could go on and on, but there are mistakes we often make in relationships which lead to their downfall. These mistakes happened for a reason, as nothing happens by chance. They happened so that we could LEARN from our situation. And life keeps on presenting the same lessons to us until we learn to do things differently, so there is no escape.
We should train ourselves to look for the positives in every situation, as well as our relationships. If we dwell on what is wrong, we just make ourselves unhappy and gain nothing. Do yourself a favour and look back on all the relationships you have ever had. Find at least one good thing about every one of them, even if they didn’t end well. Then look at your present relationship and do the same thing. It is often more difficult to do this in the present, as we are so involved we often cannot see things in their true perspective. Something we can do is ask a friend if they can see any blessings that we are blind to. Our friends will give opinions that come from a completely different frame of reference, and they can often see things more clearly than we can when we are so caught up in a situation.
Don’t: Beat yourself up about it if a relationship has not worked out.
Do: Learn from your mistakes, see the blessings and move on.
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
Firstly it is good to remember that there is a divine balance in our universe. To the degree that something is bad, we can also find good things about it! You might ask what good there could possibly be in your situation, but if you think very deeply and for some time, you are bound to come up with some benefits, believe it or not. Often it is only in hindsight that we can see these blessings, but they are always there, if we just scratch beneath the surface.
Perhaps we “pushed” a relationship that was not yet “ripe”. Perhaps we took our partner for granted. Perhaps we neglected our partner. Maybe we were selfish … This list could go on and on, but there are mistakes we often make in relationships which lead to their downfall. These mistakes happened for a reason, as nothing happens by chance. They happened so that we could LEARN from our situation. And life keeps on presenting the same lessons to us until we learn to do things differently, so there is no escape.
We should train ourselves to look for the positives in every situation, as well as our relationships. If we dwell on what is wrong, we just make ourselves unhappy and gain nothing. Do yourself a favour and look back on all the relationships you have ever had. Find at least one good thing about every one of them, even if they didn’t end well. Then look at your present relationship and do the same thing. It is often more difficult to do this in the present, as we are so involved we often cannot see things in their true perspective. Something we can do is ask a friend if they can see any blessings that we are blind to. Our friends will give opinions that come from a completely different frame of reference, and they can often see things more clearly than we can when we are so caught up in a situation.
Don’t: Beat yourself up about it if a relationship has not worked out.
Do: Learn from your mistakes, see the blessings and move on.
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Have you ever tried to force a relationship?
There are a lot of us who have regrets in this life, and many who wish our lives were different. We look back and think of all sorts of situations we could have handled in a better way. Some of us look back on divorces and bad choices we made when selecting previous partners. Often we made wrong decisions only yesterday. Many of us are even guilty of forcing relationships and then wondering why they did not work out. What are the benefits of having a more relaxed approach to life and dating? How do we learn to let go and rather let the Universe organise things for us?
The first thing to know is that our Creator is in charge, and that the universe is arranging all things for our good. We often overlook the blessing when we are going through a rough patch. We see nothing good about what is happening to us at the time. Sometimes it is only years later that we see how that difficult time actually benefitted us, and that it was a good thing that it happened. Hindsight is an exact science, but most of us have been around long enough to know that there are many sides to most situations, both good and bad. The trick is to have a positive outlook and always look for the benefits of a situation. They are there, if we will just put our minds to it. It only makes us unhappy to dwell on the negative aspects of a situation, so we should learn to rather dwell on the positive side of the equation. Knowing that there are always positives to any situation should help us to relax a little about what is happening and this should also help us to have a happy mindset. Then we can say with a cheerful heart, “What’s meant to be is meant to be”. We never know what life is going to present us with, but if we just do what we have to do and relax about the outcome, we will have a serenity that nothing can take away.
We can also apply this attitude to our relationships. We often wish we could have our lives over and be wiser in our choice of partners. But if we look on the bright side, the universe allowed us to make those mistakes in order that we could be wiser and learn from them. If a relationship does not work out for whatever reason, be assured that there is someone better waiting for you around the next corner, someone more suited to you, who will appreciate you more than your previous partner did. I myself was once in love with someone who was no good for me. And because a relationship never got off the ground with him, I was open to a relationship with someone far better suited to me. But I would never have believed that at the time. Things were unclear to me then, but now many years have passed, I see the wisdom of my Creator, who actually had the best in mind for me. It was all a learning curve.
God’s timing is also perfect. We want things yesterday, but He knows best, and will give us what we need when the time is right. When we are pushing and chasing a relationship, it often seems to be running away from us all the time. But when we relax and let the universe unfold, and bring our partner gently to us, it is the best relationship we could ever have hoped for. Our Creator does things much better for us and in far grander style than we could ever hope to imagine!
Don’t: Try to force a relationship with anyone.
Do: Relax, enjoy your dating, and detach yourself from the results.
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
The first thing to know is that our Creator is in charge, and that the universe is arranging all things for our good. We often overlook the blessing when we are going through a rough patch. We see nothing good about what is happening to us at the time. Sometimes it is only years later that we see how that difficult time actually benefitted us, and that it was a good thing that it happened. Hindsight is an exact science, but most of us have been around long enough to know that there are many sides to most situations, both good and bad. The trick is to have a positive outlook and always look for the benefits of a situation. They are there, if we will just put our minds to it. It only makes us unhappy to dwell on the negative aspects of a situation, so we should learn to rather dwell on the positive side of the equation. Knowing that there are always positives to any situation should help us to relax a little about what is happening and this should also help us to have a happy mindset. Then we can say with a cheerful heart, “What’s meant to be is meant to be”. We never know what life is going to present us with, but if we just do what we have to do and relax about the outcome, we will have a serenity that nothing can take away.
We can also apply this attitude to our relationships. We often wish we could have our lives over and be wiser in our choice of partners. But if we look on the bright side, the universe allowed us to make those mistakes in order that we could be wiser and learn from them. If a relationship does not work out for whatever reason, be assured that there is someone better waiting for you around the next corner, someone more suited to you, who will appreciate you more than your previous partner did. I myself was once in love with someone who was no good for me. And because a relationship never got off the ground with him, I was open to a relationship with someone far better suited to me. But I would never have believed that at the time. Things were unclear to me then, but now many years have passed, I see the wisdom of my Creator, who actually had the best in mind for me. It was all a learning curve.
God’s timing is also perfect. We want things yesterday, but He knows best, and will give us what we need when the time is right. When we are pushing and chasing a relationship, it often seems to be running away from us all the time. But when we relax and let the universe unfold, and bring our partner gently to us, it is the best relationship we could ever have hoped for. Our Creator does things much better for us and in far grander style than we could ever hope to imagine!
Don’t: Try to force a relationship with anyone.
Do: Relax, enjoy your dating, and detach yourself from the results.
© 2010 Marilyn Welch
Friday, July 1, 2011
How to have abundance in your relationship
We are now officially into winter and as it becomes colder we are aware of how nice it can be to have someone special to cuddle up with. We actually want much more than that. We all want a relationship that is abundant.
The word “abundant” implies that there is more than sufficient of something, that there is a wealth of whatever it is that is abundant. One immediately thinks of a relationship that is very happy, with plenty of love flowing between the two partners.
How does one establish such a relationship?
A relationship like this is built on a good, solid foundation. All these things do not come immediately. In short, a relationship like this is earned. We all think that in the beginning, when everything is moonshine and roses, that OF COURSE we have abundance in our relationship, but, if after a year or two, all that love and happiness is still there, then you have definitely EARNED the abundance in your relationship. This abundance, that you have obviously worked hard to maintain, is of the lasting kind as good relationship habits pave the way to it.
Men like their freedom, and women like their security. Are you providing these elements in your relationship? Women, if you are giving your men freedom, they will appreciate it and if the relationship is meant to be, they will always come back to you with loving hearts. If you give them their freedom, and they don’t come back to you, there is always someone else out there who will appreciate you building on this important long-term pillar in a relationship. Men, are you giving your girlfriends a lot of love and care and do they know that they can count on you? These are the things that make women feel secure and they will always love you for it. Giving freedom and security to one’s partner is not always easy, and often requires sacrifice on your part, over and over again. Make it a long term habit, and you will be amply rewarded with love and happiness in your relationship.
Caring and consideration are also important elements in a relationship. Sometimes one does not feel like being considerate, because it doesn’t suit one, but this always comes at the cost of the relationship. Everything has a price. Wouldn’t it be a good idea to pay small increments on a consistent basis towards your relationship in the form of sound relationship habits? Soon you will no longer notice that it is an effort, and it will come naturally and easily. Nothing worthwhile is achieved in life without sacrifice of some sort, and with time the good habits will be ingrained in you. Being selfish and thinking only of oneself can cost a relationship dearly. Your partner will not be happy and love will fly out of the window.
Don’t: Take your partner for granted.
Do: Practice generosity with your partner, especially generosity of your time and your love
© 2009 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
The word “abundant” implies that there is more than sufficient of something, that there is a wealth of whatever it is that is abundant. One immediately thinks of a relationship that is very happy, with plenty of love flowing between the two partners.
How does one establish such a relationship?
A relationship like this is built on a good, solid foundation. All these things do not come immediately. In short, a relationship like this is earned. We all think that in the beginning, when everything is moonshine and roses, that OF COURSE we have abundance in our relationship, but, if after a year or two, all that love and happiness is still there, then you have definitely EARNED the abundance in your relationship. This abundance, that you have obviously worked hard to maintain, is of the lasting kind as good relationship habits pave the way to it.
Men like their freedom, and women like their security. Are you providing these elements in your relationship? Women, if you are giving your men freedom, they will appreciate it and if the relationship is meant to be, they will always come back to you with loving hearts. If you give them their freedom, and they don’t come back to you, there is always someone else out there who will appreciate you building on this important long-term pillar in a relationship. Men, are you giving your girlfriends a lot of love and care and do they know that they can count on you? These are the things that make women feel secure and they will always love you for it. Giving freedom and security to one’s partner is not always easy, and often requires sacrifice on your part, over and over again. Make it a long term habit, and you will be amply rewarded with love and happiness in your relationship.
Caring and consideration are also important elements in a relationship. Sometimes one does not feel like being considerate, because it doesn’t suit one, but this always comes at the cost of the relationship. Everything has a price. Wouldn’t it be a good idea to pay small increments on a consistent basis towards your relationship in the form of sound relationship habits? Soon you will no longer notice that it is an effort, and it will come naturally and easily. Nothing worthwhile is achieved in life without sacrifice of some sort, and with time the good habits will be ingrained in you. Being selfish and thinking only of oneself can cost a relationship dearly. Your partner will not be happy and love will fly out of the window.
Don’t: Take your partner for granted.
Do: Practice generosity with your partner, especially generosity of your time and your love
© 2009 Marilyn Welch
Would you like to meet your soulmate this year? If you have read through my website thoroughly and feel that you would like to work with me, contact me for a free, no-obligation “get-acquainted” session. We can then see what Perfect Strangers can do for you and get you started to meet the partner of your dreams. I am looking forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to use this article? You may if you include the following paragraph with the article: Marilyn Welch is the owner of Perfect Strangers Professional Dating Service and a sought after Relationship Coach specialising in social skills. You can read more of her articles at www.perfectstrangersdating.blogspot.com and download her Free Special Report “Three Ways to Finding the Soulmate of Your Dreams” by going to her website, www.perfectstrangers.co.za and sending her your details.
You are welcome to email Marilyn Welch at info@perfectstrangers.co.za.
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